I'm on top of the world

It’s been a month since I’ve started dating Tyrel, and every day I become happier and spend less time thinking about John. I think back to where I was 6 weeks ago, a time when I was left on the back burner, unknown about the outcome of my future. How I spent many nights crying, waiting for a phone call that never came and feelings of being unloved. Finally something snapped, and my fuse of patience ran out. I finally decided that enough was enough.

Since I’m started my new relationship, I look back and wonder what the hell I was thinking. Me and John are two different people with completely different personalities. The fact that I was able to put up with him for 5 years amazes me. And I don’t understand why I gave him so many opportunities and chances to get back together with me. But now, even if I didn’t have a boyfriend, I still wouldn’t want to get back together with him. I loved John but he broke my heart. Now it’s healed and I look back at the type of person he really is. I think about the arguments we had and the stupidest things he would get mad at me for and how he treated me. Sure it didn’t happen all the time, but I would say 40% of the time he was an asshole to me. I always said that I was happy being with John, but was I really happy or “brainwashed” into thinking that I was happy? I may never know the answer to that, but all I do know is that I’m VERY happy being in my current relationship.

Being in my current relationship I finally feel free to do the things that I enjoy doing. And aside from our different taste in music, we seem to have everything else in common- types of food we eat, activities and hobbies. I’ve been doing things that I normally didn’t get to do when I was dating John. I have someone who treats me like a human being and with respect. Someone to hold and call me beautiful. I think one of my favorite things about Tyrel, is how random and spontaneous he is. We could wake up and not have any plans and I will tell him, “Well I feel like doing this today,” and we will go and do it, no questions asked!

John is nothing but a distant memory to me now. And although we are broken up, I still think about the happy memories we shared together. I only hope that he has learned his lesson and doesn’t make the same mistakes so that he can be happy once again.

Why I love my life

I love the way I'm happy once again
I feel that I am myself
I have started a new chapter in my life- new job, new beginning, new boy
I've forgotten the past and started thinking about a better future
I cherish the good memories but forget about the bad ones
I feel on top of the world
I'm finally listening to my heart
I do the things I love to do
I'm not criticized for what I like/do
I've become a stronger person
I've become more independent
I am doing this because it's something that I want to do, not other people
My family rocks
My friends are awesome
I look forward to going to work everyday
I have moved on!